Differences

It’s good to be different. I feel like that’s a classic “growing up” statement. It’s healthy to have differences…another one. It’s good to not want what everyone else wants and to have different feelings. What would the world be like if everyone were the same? Probably pretty boring. I often think back on books like The Chrysalides or The Giver that focus on utopian or uniform worlds to the extreme. What would it be like to live in a world like that? A world where everything had order and all people lived in that manner? Even a world where everyone agreed and always got along? What if all the relationships in your life were like that? I wonder if it would be good or if it would end up being destructive because eventually someone would just want everything to change. Sometimes differences can be scary. When two people have a relationship/friendship/whatever and want two different things it can cause you to think about what’s worth it for you and what’s worth it for them?

Sometimes a compromise can be met and sometimes it can’t. I’m sure we’ve all had past friendships where things eventually became so different or both people were on such opposite paths that we had to walk away because no one was willing to meet in the middle. It’s important to find balance, to communicate, to say no but to also be willing to compromise. I think that’s one of the main reasons how you survive differences is through compromise. If the person means that much to you, then really will the sacrifice be that great if it makes someone you care about happy? Sometimes it is and sometimes it isn’t. I knew someone once who was so focused on themselves and was unwilling to compromise or change. I watched it destroy them. It’s good to have differences, but if your differences get in the way of you being able to maintain a healthy relationship with anyone then it’s probably time to reevaluate and figure out what really matters to you. Don’t let a difference of opinion or even a difference of want (unless it’s something crucial, this is more in reference to superficial things) wreck the relationships in your life. I mentioned this several weeks ago and it has been a constant reminder in my head ever since. Choose your battles but don’t choose too many.

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